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Dear Smidgeon, There I am, all grumpy and mopey this morning, when all of a sudden, I hear Sounds from the box pile in the kitchen. (This is a pile of boxes about five feet tall and eight or so feet wide, mostly of eBay merchandise and empty boxes for shipping such. It is a perfect cat playground). Lo and behold, the new spool of bubblewrap comes bouncing down the pile with a kitten hugged splay-legged to it. The spool is about a foot and a half in diameter. Maybe two feet. Your little legs don't stretch that far. The spool bounced down boxes like they were a staircase, with you hugging it all the way. Then it bounced on the kitchen floor like a giant rubber ball. Twice. With you still hugging it. Then it rolled into the living room. With you still attached. Then finally rolled to a stop, SOMEHOW, upright. And you pulled yourself up onto on top, splayed yourself on it, and started gnawing the chewy cardboard center. I don't know if you meant to do that, or if you just went along for the ride. I also don't remember the last time I giggled so hard, but it gave me a side-cramp doing it this morning. I'm so glad you've come to live with us. Obviously The Phooka made a wonderful choice. Ringworm and all. Tags: smidgeon
Current Mood:  amused
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...ISN'T one you find in the litter box.... Smidgie is very helpful with litterbox scooping. As I am raking, her little paw on a long kitten leg appears and "rakes" with me. Then she climbs in and uses the box, all the time looking up at me with wide eyes. "See? I'm doing it right, aren't I?' This is how I can monitor her poops. And how I found the worm. Fortunately, it wasn't moving, so the meds are doing their job. Unfortunately, now Nox is having ... er... puddly poop. Yet another call to the vet, who said that the meds they both got last month would have killed the worms and they very well could be still shedding them. Monitor the litterbox and let's hold off giving the poor kids MORE meds, since I've been either shoving meds in or rubbing meds on for over a month and a half straight. They are really driving me insane. So insane, that for the last two weeks, I honestly-to-god thought this week was Thanksgiving. And therefore planned as such. I usually spend Thanksgiving alone and rather like it that way. Calmness in the midst of madness. My bestest friend coming over the day before to watch movies all day long. Traditionally I wrap xmas presents on Thanksgiving itself, and I NEVER set foot outside the house on Black Friday. Nor do I set foot in a grocery store on the day before. So I made sure to do all my errands on Tuesday. And wondered why Mere didn't show up on Wednesday... Scolded my mother when she said she did grocery shopping yesterday afternoon. And finally it kicked in with mom to tell me that Thanksgiving is NEXT week. Between eBay, the sick cats, and my fibro... I've really lost it this time. I've missed a day or two before. Once half a week. But I've never lost track of life this badly. I swear I'm just getting worse and worse. I'm taking today off. Going to the movies. I almost never do that anymore. Gonna go see the end of the world in 2012. For a few hours, there will be no eBay, no cats, and I don't even have a migraine today. I have to travel a little farther than I'd like to find a showing that doesn't end before dark... but I'm gonna go watch the world end in lots of special effects and 'splody bits. So there. Tags: movies, nox, rant-n-raves, smidgeon
Current Mood: I've had it!
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Dear Grey Cat, You were my nemesis for a while. Ever since I found blood and feathers Within The Fence (my bird feeding area) actually. For the next few months, I chased you away every time I saw you. After all, "my" birds even have names, and I wasn't intending them to be served up as an all-you-can-eat buffet. And my neighbors would chuckle yet again at me (I am ever a source of amusement) as I'd charge out on my porch and scold, "Don't you eat anybody!" after you as you streaked across the road or into someone else's yard. You started out by hiding under my hedge, laying in wait. Then when I tucked thorny branches under them, you took a more direct approach and made a nest for yourself out of autumn leaves... under one of the bird feeders! By this time, if you even saw me in the window, you booked. We understood each other. Eating my little feathered and furry friends was not something I wanted you to do. So you'd just do it when I wasn't watching. Then one cold and rainy night, I looked out, and there you were under the bird feeder, and I realized you hadn't been waiting for the unsuspecting bird. You were eating the suet (the meat fat that holds together the seed) that had fallen from the feeder. You were so hungry, that you were eating bird food. I went out in the rain with a can of cat food. You took one look at me and booked as usual. For the next couple of days, I tried to coax you closer with the can. You'd give me the big-eyed look of "Hey, Lady. I'm not stupid. You've been chasing me away for months, now." And off you'd go. Once I tried to follow you. Once again, the neighbors got a good laugh as they saw me clamboring through their bushes holding a can of cat food and calling out various sounds and coaxes. I am nothing, if not amusement to those around me. Obviously, I was going to have to use the big guns. I called the park maintenence and they brought over a Have-A-Heart trap. This is the third cat I've caught for them. I'm actually getting fairly good at this. I set the trap by the bird feeder, donated my own cans of really smelly fishy cat food, and figured I'd have you by the end of the day. You disappeared for a full week. Then today, when I drove in from running errands, there you were under the feeder, eating bird food again. I bustled out, my best coaxing voice in tune, and you gave me That Look again ("Honestly, Lady, do you REALLY expect me to fall for this?") ... but this time, you disappeared under my house instead of running further away. AHA!! I ran inside to get more food and put some in a bowl by the place where you had disappeared and then started to set out a little trail of food in tiny piles, leading from the bowl all the way around the corner of the house to the trap, which I then set under the feeder. Teeny tiny piles of food, so you wouldn't eat yourself full all at once.
And then I ran back inside and sat by the window.
I didn't have long to wait. In just a few minutes, you tiptoed around the corner... and saw me in the window.
You ran light lightning. And came right back less than five minutes later.
Saw me in the window.
Ran like lightning. Okaaaay....so I backed up a little. Then started to do contortions, so I could still see the trap, but hopefully you wouldn't see me.
And here you came again.
And went all the way around the trap and sniffled. And it must have smelled really good, because you tried to slip your little paw through the bars. Then you peered up at the window again, but by that time, I was having muscle spasms in the effort to keep you from seeing me. So you circled the trap a few more times, then finally went in and started eating...
...and the damn trip bar didn't go off So I smashed my head against the desk and then started to open the window, thinking maybe my Trusty Stick (tm) would reach the door and trip it.
And of course, you saw me and streaked away.
I did the head-desk again, then thought, well, you ATE the food, nothing bad happened to you, and you only got a couple of bites... maybe you'll be back for more. Just in case, I ran out and moved the trap to right by the window so I could reach it, wiggled the trip bar and got it better set, and poured MORE food in, and ran back indoors.
And about 15 minutes later, there you were. This time, you were very cautious and spent about another 15 minutes going round and round the trap, picking up every bit of food and bird-suet you could find. And peering up into the window. And sniffing at the food in the trap. Trying again to reach through the bars with your paw...
And when that didn't work, you finally went in again... right up TO the trip bar, leaned over it and ate. Not touching the trip bar. Yeah, by this time, I'm chewing my nails ragged.
You ate all the food near the trip bar and there was still a can at the very end, and you stepped OVER the trip bar. Still not touching it.
Damn, kid. Who taught you about these things anyway? And every few bites, you look up at the window, and by now you've seen me, but I can see in your eyes that you are beginning to change your mind about me. I've given you food. I'm not chasing you. I can't be all that bad. Aaaand I'm indoors and can't reach you. And your eyes begin to soften as you eat and watch me.
You start to enjoy the food, start to relax just a bit... and just as I am beginning to think that I'm going to have to open the window and poke the trap with my Trusty Stick (tm) after all... you touch the trip bar.
WHACK! And you whirl around, then look up at me and I swear, your expression was ... wounded
"How could you DO THIS to me!"
So I call the park and they said they'll come to pick you right up, and I bustle outdoors in 30F degree weather to keep you company. By that time, you're bawling. So I sit next to you, not sure if you are going to be mean to me or not, but I stick my fingers through the bars and begin to rub your back. I can feel your bones through your fur. You have a beautiful face, and your grey fur is exactly the color of The Phooka. Very slowly, you seem to remember what being petted is. You don't reach out to me, but if I touch you first, you rub back.
Little one, you are going to the vet, who will look you all over to make sure you are all right. You will be warm and be fed. No more cold nights and hunting for scraps. No more bird food. If your owners don't come to claim you, and they don't deserve a cat like you if they haven't abandoned you already, then you will be put up for adoption, to find a family who will remind you what it is like to be petted and loved and who will never let you forget those wonderful things again. The scary lady, who isn't so scary after all.
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Smidgeon, you darling little idiot, you need to wake up to the fact that The Phooka is BIGGER THAN YOU! He is huge. He is almost THREE TIMES your weight. And he is a lop, which means that he is not mostly leg, like other breeds of rabbits. His weight is all muscle and bulk. It would be the equivelent of me seeing an upended refrigerator hurtling down at me. Therefore, my dear kitten, when he is racing across the room for his beloved salad, it is NOT the time to pull to an abrupt stop in front of him to half roll over and clean your butt. Besides the above mentioned bulk.. he also has really really rotten brakes. It is only out of sheer luck for you that he was getting his salad just a little bit earlier than usual and so he wasn't quite as hungry as usual, that he was able to stop in time, and I have to say that I admire his self-control. I've seen him bowl over bigger and fiercer obstacles than you on his way to his salad. I was amazed that all he did was look at you, then at me in sheer apalled amazement, then at you and back at me again. And STILL he didn't charge right through you. You have no idea how lucky you are, scamp. Tags: smidgeon, the phooka
Current Mood: amused
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Dear Smidgie I am delighted that you love your new feather boa so much! But why do you insist on dropping it in your water bowl? I can understand you wanting to keep your Feathered Lure toy in your food bowl. That way, you always know where it is, and your food bowl is usually empty. But your water bowl is FULL, which makes your feather boa wet. And soggy. And messy to play with. And then you bring it into my lap. While it is wet. And soggy. And, when you do that in the dark, rather scary, until I identify it as your wet soggy feather boa. I also did enjoy watching you pretend that my sneakers were trying to eat your feather boa and you had to attack them and pull your feather boa out from inside of them. It was a very dramatic performance, and you certainly taught my sneakers several very important lessons about messing with your toys. I was also very glad you did that segment of play BEFORE you dunked your feather boa in your water bowl. Also, I'm not sure your sister Nox or your Lapine Brother The Phooka appreciate having bits of feather swimming in their drinking water. I'm still wondering about the WHYS of that one. All love, The provider of feathered fun stuff. Tags: smidgeon
Current Mood: bewildered
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